thesportsfag | my gay sports blog

San Diego Chargers’ running back LaDainian Tomlinson just released this really awkward Electric Glide video for some reason.

Look out player, LT says he’s gonna serve us a new dance, oh Snap, Crackle and Pop! Wow, this is gonna be a little uncomfortable isn’t it….memo to LT, this failed move is about 25 years old but I love your new lyrics.

I was expecting Adam Sandberg to jump in thinking this was a Saturday Night Live parody of something, but grew increasingly uncomfortable as I realized this wasn’t a spoof.

I felt sexier after watching former Senator Tom Delay on Dancing With The Stars, at least he made me laugh.

So Sammy Sosa shows up on the red carpet at the Latin Grammy Awards show looking like me when I’m finished worshipping the porcelain god — or plastic if, god forbid you gotta hurl in a Port-O-Potty — and expects us to believe a skin cream gave him that ‘i just died’ look.

Oh OK, I get it, I’m supposed to believe the same guy who when explaining his extreme weight gain, denied using steroids. We are all vain and it’s OK to admit it, man up, own it. Be a real man Sammy. Either he’s trying to score some high school tail with his new Twilight/True Blood look or he’s filling the void left by The King of Pop in the Worst African-American Cosmetic Decisions category.

OK, maybe I’m being a little harsh on Sammy, but if he wants to clear things up, no pun intended, he should show his face versus hiding behind statements. Otherwise, I, and many others, will consider Sammy for what he really is, a liar. In the interest of full disclosure, I have had botox. OK, twice.

Even though I’m a gay man, I’m not much of a gay activist. I realize that sports, my area of expertise, is probably the most homophobic institution left in America. That’s why when I saw this MTV story idea for their Tru Life documentary/series I thought it would be important to pass it along.

MTV is looking for gay athletes who want to come out to their teammates as part of the series. Here’s the link. Pass it on if you know someone who’s possibly interested.

Coming out, especially as a gay athlete, is a tremendously personal decision and should not be forced upon anyone. Visibility for homosexuals within normal societal institutions is important, it leads to acceptance. It’s harder to hate someone that you know personally.

If I, in some small way, can help reverse the stereotype that being gay equals being effeminate or weak then I’m all on board. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with guys who are effeminate, but it’s not what all gay men are about. Unfortuntely, in my opinion, that steretype is far too often celebrated and used against us, as abnormal behavior, by those who wish to discriminate.

Although I’m excited that MTV is doing this, I’m also skeptical about how MTV will portray this person and whether they will get someone from one of the five major sports — yes, I included soccer — versus highlighting a gay athlete from the somewhat already accepting world of gymnastics and/or swimming/diving.

For sports junkies like myself, keeping up on sports while vacationing is tricky. When you add your significant other who happens to be a casual sports fan to the mix, it can certainly lead to conflict. Since Eric, my husband, loves beer we can usually compromise on a sports bar where I can comfortably check out the game or SportsCenter. So, in order to make things perfect for our wedding week I decided to abstain from sports as much as possible.

To ensure maximum success, I planned the wedding on what I felt like was the worst college football weekend of the year and just prior to the start of baseball’s post season. To further aid my effort to become a sports virgin for a week I knew I had to give myself something to look forward to — positive reinforcement for my good behavior. So what’s a trip to Boston without a visit to Fenway? That’s like going to the beach but never getting in the water. My husband likes baseball and the Red Sox, so I was able to disguise my reward as part of the honeymoon.

I cheated once during the week, catching a sneak peek at the Alabama/Arkansas game. I figured watching Bama lose on my wedding day would make things perfect. But alas, Nick Satan was trying to ruin my wedding day so I decided to get dressed instead. I watched it for less than a minute so I don’t feel like that was really cheating. It was kind of like just putting the head in.

Surprisingly, I made it through the week sans withdrawals. The lack of down time was a major factor in making my sports abstinence tolerable. After all, if this had been a leisure vacation with lots of free time I would’ve needed my fix.

I’m sure I’m not the only gay sports fan who has had to juggle family and quality time with sports time. But I can tell you it sure does make life easier for us if we can get our husbands to become fans of the sports we love.

Let me start off by saying that not by any measure would I consider myself a gay marriage activist. So asking my boyfriend to marry me wasn’t for purposes of making a statement rather it seemed like the normal thing to do. After all, he’s my one true love and we’ve been together for 12 years. Why wouldn’t we?

It all came to fruition this past weekend on Herring Cove Beach in Provincetown. My husband’s uncle, a registered minister, performed the ceremony in front of our closest friends and some of our family. There were more straights than gays attending with a few curious onlookers and well wishers. I would highly suggest the trip and expense of a Provincetown wedding if anyone is considering it.

Although I don’t consider myself an activist, I felt it was important for us to show our family and friends that our commitment to each other was normal. It’s my opinion that us gays (I love saying it like that) can have a positive impact on those who care for us but may not agree with everything about us, if they witness us doing things they can relate to versus segregating ourselves and/or behaving outside the norm.

On a number of occasions my best friend’s wife has told us that she loves us but doesn’t agree with our ‘lifestyle.’ So we’ve been through a few late night, alcohol induced discussions but there’s no changing her mind. Those are her beliefs; ingrained since childhood by a patriarchal religious construct that benefits from instilling an “us against them view of the world.” I will always be amazed why women support this construct even though it goes against their own self interests but that’s another story. Who really knows what our straight friends and family members think or say about us when we aren’t around?

I believe that people and institutions only change when it benefits them. The information age has made it much more difficult for a group like the church to demonize of us when our friends and families can see how normal we really are. I consider myself extremely lucky to be living in this country and at this time. I can only imagine how difficult my life would have been if I had been born only a generation ago or in a less democratic country.

There are still friends and family members who don’t know I’m gay or who I just avoid altogether cause I don’t feel like they are intelligent enough to consider acceptance. Using logic and science to advance the discussion with those who beliefs are faith based is like trying to convince a top to bottom. They really want to but they are too uptight.

And even though they may not readily admit it I think attending our wedding changed their minds somewhat. At least until they get home and watch Fox News.

No more politics. Back to SPORTS!!!!